Landon in Car

Landon and Grandpa Karl

Thoughts about Hospice Grief Support Group

I  completed a five-week grieving course at the Homecare/Hospice here in Manhattan – 10 sessions, three hours a week.  I  appreciated the facilitator Dan Clayton and my support group of 12.  I've learned grief is a normal reaction to loss, how it impacts us is different to each of us.  It usually is hard to make sense of the process, but in the end, it will involve: accepting the reality of the death, experiencing the pain of grief, adjusting to an environment in which the deceased is missing – loss of presence, finding a way to memorialize the loved one, and press on with one's life.

Different techniques were taught to us to monitor how we are doing: keeping a journal, "who are you" exercise, and assessing our well-being.  And finally, getting help when I need it is a sign of strength, not weakness.

1.  The process of mom dying seems so surreal to be.  My question to me constantly was, "what just happened here."

2.  I found starting with John 11 in the Bible and other scriptures that grieving is not a process to go through alone. Even Job in his illness, had friends who came and sat with him.

3.  In my support group I was able to verbalize my "elephants in the room" with everyone, instead of internalizing and smothering things.  Job, after a period of seven days and seven nights verbalized his feelings.

4. Like Job, we don't just grieve the loss of family and friends.  We can also grieve the loss of property, pets, ability, and health.

5.  Finding balance in doing something for me, to find joy.  Balance can change. Physically caring for my body was a little neglected.  The other areas to maintain and be aware of is the mental, spiritual, and emotional components.

Remember me and your Mom are here for you. Grandma G's death is still very fresh, so it's ok to talk about her. We are ok about this. So thankful and blessed to have you guys. 

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY

HAPPY 4TH ANNIVERSARY

We love you guys!!!

Grandma is OUT

we were able to break grandma out without incident. although they wanted to keep her until friday.  i think it was just because she hadn't reached the 20 day limit. she was fully functional and most importantly, her lungs were clear. so we made the call, checked with the dr and busted her out!

we finished up her apartment late tuesday. we were dead tired, so wednesday was the veg-out day.  a big thanks to rena and jeff for coming to help and being a great ground support for me.

thanks so much for your prayers and for checking on grandma. continue to be diligent in calling and checking in with her. she loves to hear from all of you. she is your biggest prayer warrior- honor her!

she will be going home to her apartment today. i know that she is anxious about how it looks. we really purged her apartment, so she will probably go through a mourning period. keep calling and encouraging her.

love you much!
again, we need updates! thanks har for the latest updates and congrats!

Grandma is Breaking Out TODAY

hey gang! hopefully we will not experience any difficulties breaking Grandma out of Rapid Recovery today. me, Ren and Jeff will be headed out to "pick up the package" around 1:30pm.

please pray for all to be well, that she is will checked out ok w/o issues and strength for us to finish her apartment today.

we are going through the apartment- throwing out, re-purposing, cleaning and re-arranging. this is so that pathways are clear, clutter is eliminated and she can feel safe and secure.

she will stay at our house tonight for sure, because her apartment is not finished yet.

that's it for now...
on my way.... 

Update on Grandma A

I spoke with mom on the phone around 8am and she asked that I send along this update about Grandma Azer:

Grandma's health is improving. She will be released on Tuesday. The decision has been made that, at this point, we are not going to transfer G'ma to nursing care. Mom and Rena spent time yesterday visiting various facilities and speaking with SRS reps about what Grandma is qualified for. In weighing the options, they felt the best option is for G'ma to return to her apartment. To that end, Mom, Rena and Jeff have been cleaning the apartment. Mom described this process as, tear down, destroy the apartment and put it back together in a clean, organized and user friendly way. They plan to rid of some of the furniture to make sure there is more open space for G'ma to move her walker through the apartment. Dr. Meek has visited G'ma and has given the ok for long term nursing facility care (if or when we get to the point that G'ma needs it). According to the doctor's nurse, he is planning to retire next summer. So, G'ma has his care for the time being. There is a lot to be done before grandma's release on Tuesday. Continue to be in prayer for G'ma, the nursing home staff and family members (obviously ourselves included).

Love,
Lee

Good News

Hi all,

I'm writing to share some good news
(though it's news that has to be kept quiet until the press release goes out in two weeks)

I found out yesterday that I was awarded the McKnight Advancement Fellowship at the Playwrights' Center for the 2015-16 season.
It is the most prestigious of the Center's awards.

More information here:
https://pwcenter.org/programs/mcknight-advancement-fellowships

The fellowship virtually assures that I will be in the Twin Cities for another year.

Sending love to you all,
H

Grandma A

It was a long week with Grandma!   She's such a trooper, not a whiner or complainer.  We just went to the doctor today to try to straighten out her medications and the timeframe for her at Stoneybrook. 
Finally figured out her medicines, next comes trying to figure out her future living conditions. James and I went with her to Via Christi. 

The assisted-living portion looked wonderful, but the long-term nursing side had its ups and downs. We will do more research, specifically looking at the Homestead, which is located in the same area, right off Kimball Avenue.
Rena and Jeff are on their way now from Texas.  Rena and I will work together and talk about our options. We will probably go to the SRS and find out what her options are as well.

Saturday we are supposed to go to Wichita to celebrate Brenda's birthday.
Jeff and Rena will probably stay here with Grandma and possibly do some cleanup and sorting at her apartment. 
It's all I got for now. Thanks so much for your support, texts and calls.
Now I need updates from everybody else...

Latest on Grandma A

Well...it had been a long couple of days. Grandma is still transitioning to the facility. Rotation of nurses and medicine schedules do not mix. Of course Grandma is a trooper. Dad and I have spoken with the nurses. I will be speaking with the head of the nursing this morning.

It is getting better, but I want them to know that we will watching over her and her care. 

I was able to get the necessary paperwork so that I can take care of 
Grandma's banking.

Questions from last post:

• the plan is for 2 weeks at Stoneybrook- what about after? is Stoneybrook a good fit for her? Still not sure about this. We will wait and see.
• what is our other option? Our other option is Via Christi off of Browning Ave.
• Grandma had a question about medications- do they order? does she still order through Barry's? They have her medications, we just need to stick to a schedule to get her regulated.
• need to contact Dr. Meek - if she is to permanently transfer to a nursing facility, she will need a written order from him. when do we do this?- what are the steps to be taken? Will try to get in touch with Dr. Meek today or early next week.
• if this happens- what about her apartment? what about the contents? When and if this happens, I will need help to clear and clean her apartment.